My idea of the perfect dating life is meeting a man, once monthly, for drinks, dinner, and cultural entertainment. Dressed in something sexy with spaghetti straps and four-inch Prada pumps, I would represent untouchable glamour, thin arms, delicate neck of a swan, waist small enough to accept his hand, lightly touching it; and he would be the man who embodies my philosophic ideology, value system, and zest for living. I would admire him.
How exciting to experience something like this, just twelve times per calendar year. The changing fashion. The changing news. The changing state of the world. I could not imagine having these dating experiences more frequently, and with more than one man, because it would become boring and remove me from my strict trinity of priorities: My Dog. My Work. My Yoga.
I’ve given much thought to this recently because a dear girlfriend, one who lives passionately amongst men, bleeding heart on her sleeve, daily recounts her dating experiences, and it simply blows my mind because each scenario sounds like a full blown-out job. Something that I could not do. Another girlfriend, my dear forever Jillian, in her post “How long is too long for sex” writes about how sex with a human is so important to her existence that abstaining for more than two months when single is too long.
It’s been more than one year for me. In Carrie Bradshaw vision, this would put me into virgin territory again. Something about that makes me happy. It also makes me happy to observe my girlfriends’ eyes bugging from their heads, when I tell them of this fact.
For a long time, my sister thought it was heartbreak that inspired my rigid stance on dating, relationships, and sex. But a few weeks ago, she said to me, “You know what? Do you remember that bet you made with grandfather when you were five years old? That you would owe him five dollars if you ever kissed a boy? You even put it in writing. I think you had your mind resolved then, that it would really take someone special to make you lose five bucks.”
She knows me better than anyone in the world. 🙂
I’ve had a very high quality man pursue me, as of recently. Kind. Smart. Business-minded. Successful. Handsome. And I even had a little crush and still blush when he addresses me. The other night, he invited me to drinks, at nine o’clock, following my day which started at 3am. I just did not have the energy or desire to leave my schedule. Such a dating life is not the perfect scenario for me. So I said no.
I think that humans, to exist on the most basic, organised level, must choose three activities to define their everyday existence. Just like a messy diet confuses the body, a messy schedule does, too. My three basic activities came about by chance, but as I review them, disallowing breaching of the membrane by things that do not fit, I realise that my rigid three activities equal who I am. And I am so pleased.
Dog. Work. Yoga.
Have a good day, and namaste.
What three activities define your present, everyday existence?