Hi! This week, I’m giving my body a divine pressie! What is that, you may wonder? A massage? A pedicure? A pair of Loubis? No. No. No.

I am giving myself… drum roll, please… A joyful juice cleanse!

This is the first in my history of juicing where it’s healthy. I’m not doing this for weight loss. I’m not doing this to create new behaviours. I’m doing this simply because I want to infuse my body with majestic things, specifically chlorophyll, allowing my digestive system to rest, promoting gorgeous cell growth and happiness within. And maybe to get a little-ashtanga-girl-practicing-in-India kind of high.

It all started last week when I felt so peaceful. So very zen! And I considered it. But then I thought, “No no, food is too important to my performance, and I simply will be much too hungry.” My diet is mainly that of protein: raw fish, raw nuts, and tofu being the numero uno agents. I eat lots of apples, grapefruit, and mango, too. Throw in gin and wine in moderation, and that’s about it, folks!

So I wanted this cleanse because it just screamed fresh. And it screamed something to do. My diet’s so clean that I can literally do nothing else to make it cleaner except for eliminating it completely, for a few days, and by drinking pure, raw, fresh pressed, organic juice. An excitement junkie, I therefore considered the cleanse even more so.

And then my newest man crush, Ryan Seacrest, did one. He made me laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh last week on his KissFM LA show, recounting his woes as related to wanting to eat his hand. I knew I wouldn’t want to eat my hand because this yoga’s got me in such a fab-o-rama place, so over the weekend, I planned it. No coffee. No booze. No solid food. (Note: I am not crushing on Ryan Seacrest because of his aesthetics. He is not physically attractive to me. He makes me laugh and reminds me of myself. And he loves his dog! That is why I like listening to him).

This is a three-day cleanse designed by me, sponsored by me, and using the products made by Blueprint, roughly based on their formal Excavation Cleanse. Here I am, this morning, at Whole Foods, posing with today’s joyful juices.

I was so excited. And then my iPhone camera died for good. Damaged in yesterday’s bicycle ride, it will no longer capture pictures, so it was necessary to wait until returning home to snap anything! By that point in the day, I’d consumed two of the gorgeous drinks. These ones.

9:45am: lemon cayenne agave.

11:45am: kale apple ginger romaine spinach cucumber celery parsley lemon.

And here are the other beauties!

3:30pm: arugula kale apple romaine celery cucumber lemon ginger.

And then it was yoga.

Do you like my shiny purple cutie bootie yoga trunks by alô yoga? I’m half tempted to wear these outside on the street! After a most divine ashtanga session, we took our dessert, my favourite of any juice on Earth…


And yes, by WE I mean WE.

She’s such a good girl, waiting until I say, “Bon Appetite, Gwendolyn!”

And then she wastes no time.  😉

A beautiful, red mouth. Lipstick for a lady!

I felt so high from my yoga and beet juice that I tried to pose with my juice lipstick, too.

So! I’m absolutely NOT hungry on this cleanse. It feels sooooo good that I contemplated switching to a five-day plan, but the aggressive girl in me needed tamed. I’d forgotten about a Thursday dinner that I have scheduled. And, well, a tofu burrito on Thursday morning sounds like perfection. So three days will be so wonderful! Happy! And refreshing! I simply can’t wait to start day two, and there are still two more drinks to consume tonight.

What a joyful juice cleanse:)

My body sings la la la.

Have a good day, and namaste.

Will you join me?